4 ways to leave your next job on the right note

Thu, Apr 7, 2011

HAPPO

We talk so much about “getting” a job–heck, our HAPPO initiative was partly developed as a way to help those around us find a job. But, we so rarely talk about the best way to leave a job. Yet, it’s something 99.99995 % of us will do at one point or another in our careers.

So, why the lack of conversation around the topic?

Because it’s hard.

Because it involves personal relationships and feelings.

And, because we usually like to keep those kinds of things private. Off blogs and Twitter.

But nevertheless, the issue still comes up. Every day for PR and marketing professional across the country.

Why is this topic so important? Because the manner in which you leave a job is frequently just as, or in some cases more important than the way in which you accept a job.

What do I mean? Think about the last job you left. Did you leave on good terms? Do you keep in touch with your former colleagues? Are they still employed by your former employer?

PR and marketing communities are usually quite small–even in the largest of markets. Here in Minneapolis, the cross-over in the PR field is mind-boggling. Sure, there are thousands of people employed in the PR field across the Twin Cities. But seemingly, we all know each other. My point: The community may be big in numbers, but when it comes to relationships, it’s actually quite small (read: Everyone knows everyone).

What does that mean for you? That you can’t afford to burn bridges. That it actually behooves you to stay in touch with those former colleagues after you leave that job. That it means a lot to be honest and fair when you shut the door on that employer.

Yes, how you leave your job is that important. Ask anyone.

OK, fine, so it’s important. I get it. What do I do then, you ask? How do I leave gracefully? And how do I close the door when my employer isn’t making it easy? As someone who’s been through this process more times than I’d care to admit, I thought I’d share a few of my tips today:

* Schedule an exit interview–even if your employer doesn’t. Sounds odd, right? Why would you do this? Certainly not to vent your frustrations. But instead, to share your experience as a way to help your manager down the road. Without critical information about the challenges and nuances of your job, your manager may end up repeating some of the mistakes he/she may have made with you. Don’t let that happen. At the very least, have one private conversation before you leave where you can openly discuss your experience in the role you’re leaving. Remember, aim to help your manager.

* Identify three people you’re going to keep in touch with. The key here is focus. The last two weeks of any job usually play out with a series of the same statement: “Let’s keep in touch.” 90 percent of the time, what happens? You don’t keep in touch. Why not? Because you rattled off that statement to too many people, in most cases. I’m saying pick three people you genuinely want to stay in contact with and deliberately work to make that happen. You can’t possibly stay in touch with everyone–so why try?

* Go out of your way to say thanks to your boss’s boss. Try to get 10 minutes on the schedule of your boss’s boss before you leave–even if that person is the CEO. In that meeting, come prepared to simply say thank you for the opportunity to work with the organization and lay out three quick reasons why you enjoyed your time at the company. Include personal anecdotes, if possible, and if it’s appropriate, talk about the qualities you admire in your current boss. In some cases, it can be a tough conversation to have, but trust me, just the mere fact that you request the meeting and actually have this discussion will set you apart from 95 percent of the other employees at the company–and your boss’s boss will remember you for it.

* Assemble stories and share liberally. Those last two weeks of your job go fast and before you know it, you’re out the door. Use some of that time to reflect on stories and anecdotes from your time with the employer. Exceptional experiences that made your time there worthwhile (even in the worst jobs, there’s always a few experiences you can pull from). Keep these in your hip pocket until your last day–then, make sure to share them liberally. With your boss. With your colleagues. And with those who report to you (if applicable). People form strong opinions about others based on their most recent interactions with you. For former co-workers, this is often those meetings and conversations on your last day. Make ‘em count by sharing wonderful stories about the positive experiences you had working with them and for the company.

Those are my tips. What about you? What advice do you have to share about leaving your job on the right note?

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I'm a bit behind on my blog reading, but I did want to make sure to come on here and comment. I say this over and over again, leaving a job correctly is one of the best ways to ensure that you keep that former employer as a reference and a resource as you move forward.

And as someone who is currently hiring, I am stressing that point during the interviews as well. I do not like it when it happens to me and I will not be responsible for it happening to a colleague -- give your current employer ample notice and be prepared for all scenarios when you do.

If you're going to a competing organization, it is safe to assume you may be out the door quicker than expected. Have your affairs in order -- files ready to be handed off, important information ready to share with your supervisor and whomever will be picking up the ball and running with it while they find a replacement.

If you do stay the full notice period, be as productive and responsible as you were before you gave notice. This is the last impression you are giving your employer - make it a good one.

And do not, under any circumstances, do anything to discredit or hurt the current employer.

Former employees have become clients, freelancers and equally as important referral sources for us. Just because you no longer work for the company does not mean they are not valuable to you (and vice versa).

It's been a long time since I've left a job! But to this day, Arik, I've never done an exit interview. It seemed to be an absolutely pointless exercise, more often than not organized with 1 or 2 day's notice, if that, so that HR could check an item off a list. They never seem interested in hearing what one has to say, just in getting one out the door. And I'm not one for mindless checking of said boxes. Besides which, managers usually don't want to hear where/why they may have gone wrong.

I have, however, always wrapped up my work responsibly, made sure there's continuity in the work and that both colleagues and clients know that, and said "thank you" to as many people as I could. I've also done my best to leave with no hard feelings, and one of the best ways, IMHO, to do that is to not have any contact with said previous employer for a while.

How has this helped me? By "divorcing" said previous employer for a bit, it's enabled passions to die down, on either/both sides (because regardless of how the exit takes place, it's not pleasant for anyone). And later, when everyone's feeling calmer, it's much easier to pick up a conversation and the relationship. Which is what I've always done. It's also enabled me in some cases to secure previous clients, assuming no non-compete has been breached, as my own... not to mention previous employers contracting with one as a client.

If I'm ever an employee again, might I change my tack? Sure, I might...

Interesting. I've had the exact opposite experience with managers and HR re: exit interviews. Very interested in what I had to say and really did seem like they were going to at least consider the information. But, I would acknowledge that I'm betting your experience is much more common.

I also really never considered the "cooling off" period you're suggestions after leaving the job. Again, interesting to see how different people approach it. What does "a while" entail in your view? Again, I'm probably in the minority in my approach (recurring theme with me, I know), but that approach has worked for me. If you're talking about your direct manager at the former employer, I would probably agree with the "cooling off" period. If you're talking about other colleagues and acquaintences at the job, I guess I don't usually see a reason to do anything like that. But again, different strokes for different folks, right?

Thanks for sharing, Shonali!

As far as the cooling off period goes, look at it this way: once you leave, you're no longer integral to the day-to-day workings of the business. Even if you're on good terms with everyone, chances are the nature of the relationship will change over time; people who may have been great "office buddies" are now just buddies... and how much will remain in common for those relationships to morph into "regular" ones is something no one can predict.

I'm not saying to cut off communication completely; but whereas one might earlier have been calling X every other day, give it some space, always keeping the door open for them to reach out. This lets everyone get on with their own life and then pick up the threads naturally when the time is right.

Just the other day I spoke to a friend whom I got to know as a colleague some years ago. We became very good friends while working together, and then, when I moved on, were still friendly - but we just weren't talking as often. But when I call her, or she calls me, there are no excuses ("I haven't been in touch because...") - we just pick up where we left off. The quality of our relationship hasn't changed; the parameters surrounding it have, and by not feeling obliged to "keep in touch," I think it became a deeper relationship, and the kind I truly value.

I don't know how long "a while" should be. Until it feels right, I guess, LOL. I also think the kind of situation I've described above is different to the way one stays in touch with a former boss; that can be much more delicate and, I think, calls even more for a period of "quietness."

Leave things better than you found them, if you can. Make sure the person after you can find info to help the clients keep continuity. You want the company you're leaving to look good on your resume.

Don't take negative feedback personally. Emotions are high. Act on anything that can help you improve, but dismiss anything that doesn't have a basis in reality.

Give the co-workers and boss you respect recommendations.

I like your first tip, Rebecca. "You want the company you're leaving to look good on your resume." I think a lot of us forget that message after leaving a job.

Arik,

This is an important topic to discuss. Most employees plan for their arrivals, but never their departures and that is a mistake.

I’ll add this to the discussion, it is one thing to quit on your own but how do you handle a departure that is not of your choice? Having been laid off three times in two years, I think I can crown myself the queen of the exit. ;-)

In two positions, I was given 30-days notice. One might become resentful and decide to slack off. That is the biggest mistake employees make. Often, it is not personal; it’s business…especially in a down economy. The professional thing to do is wrap your job up with a nice big bow (i.e. document everything, wrap up projects, give a helping hand to the person stepping in, etc.). And that's smart whether an employee is downsized or quits.

Employers do not remember the work you did before those 30-days. However, they will always remember how you exited and usually will not mind staying connected long after your departure.

And yes, the communities are small... Never forget that.

Cheers,@bethharte
Beth Harte

Looking for my next job: http://bit.ly/HireBethHarte

Perfect: "Employers do not remember the work you did before those 30-days. However, they will always remember how you exited and usually will not mind staying connected long after your departure." You said it, Beth...

Arik, I'd probably say to anyone before entering that meeting room: "Remember, this is a small world. You don't want to be the one to lower your head next time you see any of those people walking down the street". See you soon! ~Paul

Small community, small town, too. Like I said, here in Minneapolis, I see my colleagues in non-work situations all the time. And, like you said, I don't want to have to avoid eye contact because things didn't end well in a work situation.

Prepare that company may cut your two weeks.

Be honest on the paperwork that asks why you're leaving. The company may make changes based on the feedback.

No matter what: Don't burn bridges.

Your first point's a good one. In some cases, if you're going to what may be a competing organization, they may walk you out immediately.

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